Despair

from The Eternal Saga of the Saints by Quina Aragon

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about

Written & Performed by Quina Parchment
Written to parallel the sentiments of Psalm 42-43

lyrics

You
slipped through
the seams of my scarf
down my neck
chest
crept into my heart
blew in from
the endless sea
came with
the salty mist
on which,
with cracked lips,
I would feed
as
I would peer
into the dark blue and gray landscape
standing on a massive
jagged cliff
day after day
watching
alone
waiting for
my Hope

Once
I thought I heard
through your shrill whispers
melodies
a great throng
joyful shouts and songs
Oh, sweet memories
you brought
making
my Hope
seem but a dream
and even
white froth below
kept watch of me
mocking me
saying,
“Where is your Hope?”
their certainties
seemed sureties
Had my Hope
forgotten me?
I tightened
my scarf
to recall
that old warmth
now so far
from me

when
suddenly
your bitter gust
became rough
pushed me so hard
I felt compelled to jump
into the wide open
moaning mouth
of the turbulent waters
swallowed up
just
to escape
your icy touch
so
you rushed
through
under
around
above me
sweeping swiftly
just
to pick me up
with
your numbing clutch
but
gravity let my
heavy heart win
or lose
I was unsure
for I could not swim
and
I found myself
engulfed
unable to breathe
calling in the deep
waves and breakers
over me
when
another song
I’m certain I heard
steady, sure words
strong and gentle tune
the voice of my Hope
raised me up
to burst through
the turmoil underneath
so
you blew harder
upon the sea
trying to drown me
but
I was safe
for
wave after wave
turned out to be
grace upon grace
over me
therefore
praise and more praise
I will yet give
to my Hope,
my salvation,
even when
you slip through
the seams of my scarf
again